Today was a huge day: ultrasound day. Finding out information that will affect us every single day for the rest of our lives.
Dan and I were both up by 4:30am, unable to sleep with nerves and excitement. For me, the creeping anxieties I've had - which are completely unfounded- that something may be wrong with the baby were laying heavy on my heart. We were just incredulous that by the end of the morning we would know so much more about this little baby we are halfway to meeting.
I showed up first for the appointment and promptly announced to the office staff that I was so nervous I felt like throwing up. They laughed very graciously and kindly pointed out the available wastebaskets should the need arise. Dan came a short time later and looked about as bad as I felt- I could see the anxiety seeping out of him. He, in particular, wanted this baby to be a boy so badly he had done all he could to prepare himself to be ready for whatever news came his way.
They finally called my name and we went in and I got comfortable on the table. "We want to know what sex the baby is and we have two girls already," we started right out with. "O-kay," said the tech. "We'll see what we can see."
She gets the first views of the baby and it's curled up in a little ball. I've never seen an ultrasound picture that looks like this: the baby actually looks like a little turtle, head almost touching it's knees. "Mmmm," the tech says. "It may be tough to see anything."
And I immediately feel like a total nimrod because I've told approximately HALF OF OUR ENTIRE COUNTY that we're finding out today.
But she starts with the head and I am thrilled that there is a brain, everything measures perfectly, and looks great. She checks out the face, nose and lips- all there, all beautiful and perfect- and the rest of the spine.
I start to breathe easier.
She gets to the heart and measures the heartrate. It comes back as 138. And that's when I knew it was a boy.
Michaela and Jenna never had heartrates below 155. Something in the 130's is a totally different animal to me.
"Well, if you're looking for a boy, that's a good sign... that's low and boys run low," the tech says.
"IT IS???????????" Dan practically shouts. Honestly. He was LOUD.
She moves down to look at the stomach, kidneys, legs, arms, bladder, and again, all measure perfectly. I am just waiting for her to find the kit and the kaboodle that will confirm that it is a boy. The baby thankfully changes position and all of a sudden she says, "Yup! Look! There's the scrotum!"
"REALLY????????!!!!?????" Dan says, practically on top of me looking for this glorious image of his son's kaboodle on the screen.
"OH MY GOD!" I say, with a huge smile on my face.
"Yup... that's a boy!" she says. "Let's look a little bit more... oh yes. Here it is: it's a penis. 100% positive. That's a boy in there."
"A BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" says Dan.
"OH MY GOD!!!" says I, my brain so thrilled for him and us and our families and the millions and millions of little details going through my head.
Dan is kissing me and beaming.
The tech wraps things up, says that everything looks great and measures perfectly. We leave the office, stunned and happy and... well, just stunningly happy.
And that's when Dan, with an incredible amount of self-satisfied smugness, says to me:
"Well, my work here is done."
And I think I will laugh about that for the rest of my life.
A boy. Can you believe it? A BOY!! With the whole kit and kaboodle.