Thursday, February 26, 2009

Hmm...'Cause I would've called it "Cruel Low-Brow Bridal Humiliation"

I walked thought the bridal section of Walmart the other day (am I obsessed or what?) just because I like all the new do-it-yourself invitations and placecards and papergoods (because I definitely DO have a paper obsession) available to cost-conscious brides these days.
I also had no children with me so I was free to meander at my own leisurely pace.

Towards the end of the display, I came across a figurine that was a take off of the standard bride-and-groom-standing-together cake topper. Only in this version, the groom was sitting down, legs splayed out in front of him, his back facing the bride. And the bride was grabbing him by the back of his jacket collar and forcibly dragging him towards some imaginary altar. I presume. And she looked angry.

But the best - THE BEST- part of this whole thing was the packaging. On the box, underneath the clear plastic window, was written: "HUMOROUS WEDDING FIGURINE." And the box went on the suggest that this HUMOROUS WEDDING FIGURINE could be used not only as a cake topper, but could also be placed on each guests' table as a centerpiece.

Yes! That would be SO HUMOROUS! Because nothing says I'm making a blessed covenant before God and my family and friends with this person whom I love and cherish and will spend the rest of my life with better than a plastic figurine of an angry bride inflicting her will on a seemingly hapless victim/groom. What a knee slapper! SO HUMOROUS!!

Man, I LOVE Walmart.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

As I told you when I saw you, you NEED to be paid by Wally's to blog about your experiences there as a slice of Americana! I am not witty like you but even I have amazing experiences there and can totally relate to your stories. And when you write about your experiences there, it is better than actually BEING there because the writing is so darn good! Keep entertaining me! Love, Mommy