Corona-cation, Part 1.

In the last two weeks, our entire life has been upended.

It's hard not to feel like we're in the opening twenty minutes of a horrible disaster movie:  first you see life going about as normal, people working, kids going to school, siblings bickering, people shopping and cooking and checking their phones and enjoying the easy routine of Life As We Have Always Known It.

Then we started hearing rumblings of this awful virus (more on that later) sweeping through China.  Sure, you feel bad for them over there, but it's on the whole other side of the world and surely it won't affect you in your comfortable bubble of America.

Then it starts getting worse over there and you hear that the hospitals are being swamped with patients and people are being quarantined inside their homes, unable to leave except to buy food.  The news starts keeping track of how many people are infected and how many have died.  The president finally closes all flights between the US and China, and there's great debate about whether it was done too soon and is too draconian or it was done way too late and the damage is already done.

Warnings are starting to slip out and you can't tell if its alarmist or safety-minded: start preparing. Don't panic.  Get ready for a two week sleepover with your family.  It sounds crazy! Seriously. Two weeks of no one going about their day, going to work and school and the gym and the store and activities?  You talk about it with your husband, who smiles sweetly at you the whole time, a little bemused, but says, Sure, if you think it's a good idea, then stock up.

So the next time you go to the store, you buy two of everything you usually get.  Nothing is really different at all; the shelves are full.  You look for things like soup and some extra meat and pasta and sauce so you can throw together meals if needed.  You gulp with surprise when your bill for the week is $300, but don't really panic because you will eventually use it all even if it turns out to be nothing.

Then the NEXT time you go to the store, about a week later, the entire toilet paper row is empty except for the brands people (apparently) don't like to buy... the dreaded Scott single-ply with 1000 sheets per roll.  They do have some packages of Scott Comfort, which is thicker, and instead of one package, you buy five.  Just in case.

Your life is going along as normal until around the middle of the week of March 9th.  Coronavirus has come to the US, mostly in NY and Washington State.  The news is starting to keep track of two numbers now, the Global Cases and Deaths and the US Cases and Deaths.  The US number is small, but creeping up.  Some of the more forward thinking governors are starting to sound warnings.  I think Ohio was the first state to close all the schools for three weeks.  It seems unimaginable.

On Thursday of that week you get an email that all after school activities are cancelled. Friday you find out your school is cancelled for two weeks.  Other schools in your area are closing, too, one by one, and the rumors begin flying and you can feel the collective panic starting to rise.  How will this work? Who will take care of the kids?

On that Thursday I wrote out a carefully worded letter to all of my organizing and cleaning clients that I was going to have distributed the following week.  It says that we are concerned for everyone's safety, don't want to expose anyone unnecessarily, and that if the schools our kids go to close, we will have to suspend service so we can home with them.  By Saturday, the letter was obsolete. All our schools were closed.  I didn't hand out one letter.

That Thursday night was the peak of my anxiety.  I was feeling lousy, anxious, scared, weird, fearful, out of my element.  I had clients scheduled for Friday and I cancelled them.  I needed to shut down, to stay quiet.

Situations and guidelines were changing from morning to afternoon.  The leaders of the state and country were giving regular updates about what was happening and were really focused on trying to avoid a cataclysmic surge that would overwhelm the hospitals.  The pressure was on for Covid-19 testing, extra hospital beds, masks, protective equipment, and especially ventilators, since the people who died did so from breathing difficulties.

First all gatherings of over 50 people were discouraged.  Then it was 25.  Then 10.  Then we were told to stay at home, only leaving the house for food or medicine.  By March 22nd, we were all sheltering in place- no church, no school, no work, no shopping, no gathering, no scouting, no playdates, no sports, no nothing.  Everything was cancelled. Everything.

The phrase Social Distancing became commonplace.  Don't come within 6 feet or another person, cover your coughs and wash, wash, wash your hands.

Everyone had an opinion about what was going on.  Some though the restrictions were overkill. Some thought it was all an attempt to destroy President Trump's re-election.  Some thought we weren't doing enough.

One of the biggest complicating factors in everything was the fact that Covid-19 is fairly contagious but isn't particularly deadly, except to those who are elderly and have pre-existing conditions.  This lead to an overwhelming sense of false security among younger people that they were not going to get it.  Videos of college students abounded during the week of March 15th enjoying their Spring Break on the beaches of Florida, while other parts of the country were shut down.  Many older people seemed to have a disconnect about the seriousness of the situation in order to avoid the perils of solitude, social disconnection, and loneliness.  People began to question whether this shelter in place was really necessary... whether the cure was worse than the illness.

So starting on March 16th, the kids were home.  Michaela, a freshman at Oneonta now, was on Spring Break when it was announced they were extending break for a week.  Teachers began the Herculean task of coming up with a school at home curriculum along with video meetings and check-ins.  Parents were challenged to become teachers.  Concerns were raised about kids who depended on schools for meals or services or counseling- how do they safely get the things they need?

The last time I went to the store, the shelves were very picked over.  Not empty, per se, but you sometimes had to be creative in your substitutions.  Toilet paper was totally gone.  Paper towels were limited. Meat was limited. Tomato pasta sauces and soups were limited.  Eggs were limited.  Everyone was on their phones talking in hushed worried tones.  It was hard not to hoard items.  It skyrocketed my anxiety- this is where it really began to feel like we were in a movie.  I've seen this one before... and now I'm in it.

And we are profoundly lucky in all of this.

Yes, my business has completely shut down.  I am not seeing clients and had to lay off my employees so they can get unemployment insurance.  No money is coming in.  Thankfully, I have little overhead so I have little going out, and won't go bankrupt from shutting down.  Unfortunately, both my annual insurance and bonding bills came due this month, so I had to pay them.  But the organizing conference I was supposed to go to in early April was cancelled and refunded, so that was $700 coming back to me.  When everything goes back to normal, if people are okay with us coming back into their homes, I will be right back up and running.

Dan is still working and getting paid.  This is an incredible blessing.  He transitioned last week to working from home and will be home now until further notice.  He has set up a little workspace in my craft room and though the days are long, he is doing fine.  I try to visit him down there periodically and eat lunch with him so he has the social connection that he seems to crave.

Dan's brothers have both lost their jobs.  Our sister in law has lost her job.  The state's unemployment offices have been completely overwhelmed with jobless claims.

How was the first week of all of us home? Pretty good.  I love being at home and am thrilled to have an empty day lay before me to fill as I wish.  Jenna and Alec adjusted well and made a loose schedule for themselves.  They did school work as assigned and Alec tooted on his trombone.  Both had video meetups with teachers and friends and seemed to really like that.

We did a lot of baking, took some walks, and enjoyed the mountains of Covid-19 quarantine jokes and memes and TikToks circulating around.  Being stuck at home with four other people is not lonely.  There does seem to be a bigger focus on what we're serving/eating for lunch and dinner each day as our world gets smaller and smaller.  We play some board games to pass the time.  We're trying to get the kids to talk about any fears or anxieties they have in this new life. Dan and I watched the first two Star Wars movies.  I read everyday on the couch with Alec, all snuggled in blankets together.  I have organized a few cabinets, caught up on laundry, and worked on closing out some loose ends with the business.  I filed our taxes.  I try to stay informed but not overwhelmed with the news each day, and that's a delicate balance.

We are going on Saturday to Oneonta to pick up the rest of Michaela's belongings and bring them home.  She's home until August. As someone who has recently come to understand the joys of being in charge of her own life, being back in your parents' house for 5 months is not what you want to do.  She has come to terms with this, but did need some Come to Jesus attitude readjustments during her Spring Break as the plans were changing.  She is someone who thrives on making a plan and executing it, and a global pandemic was NOT in her plan.

Some people are really struggling.  They are worried about their financial situations, they are worried for their elderly family members, they are overwhelmed with parenting their children for 12 hours a day and keeping them occupied.  The extroverts are going crazy being stuck in their homes and do all they can to see and interact with other humans.  Stories are coming out of people in Italy singing from their balconies or exercising together or playing music.  Everyone is singing the praises of the nurses and doctors treating people who are so ill and putting themselves at risk.  Everyone who is now trying to manage their children's education is apologizing to every teacher they've ever complained to.  I see so many more people out walking, running, trying to get fresh air and burn off some energy and anxiety.  I try to open the doors and windows every day and let sunshine in.

It's hard to remember that it's okay to go outside... the air isn't dangerous.

We are enveloped in a stew of worry and it's tough.  For me, the hardest part is knowing that we are just at the start of the bad time.  There is a tsunami wave of illness and sorrow and overwhelm hanging over our heads and about to come crashing down. Here in NY, they are saying the worst will hit in 2-3 weeks.  Now the big worry is New Orleans being the next epicenter in the US.  Europe is in the throws of a calamity and India has just yesterday closed the entire country down... that's over a billion people.

There is nothing I can do except stay in my little bunker here, make life as pleasant as I can, and pray.

Pray for all of us.